Highs and Lows

Proverbs teaches that, "The heart knows its own bitterness, and no stranger shares its joy" (14:10) and, "Even in laughter the heart may ache, and the end of joy may be grief" (14:13).

My heart has been heavy the last few weeks as a few of my friends are ill - with death standing in their paths in a more tangible way than most of us recognize. Even today a good friend of the family, dad to a great friend from High School, is in the hospital with Doctors telling them, "It's not looking good." Those are words no daughter is ever ready to hear. I know some of that pain as both of my parents had complications when they decided to have elective surgery on the same day.

One of the reasons I workout is because it tests my mind along with my body. Monday's lately have been METCON intensive workouts. Think the last few weeks the workouts have taken me over 30 minutes. It's not just a matter of completing the workout. Prior to it I debate how much torture I think I can take. Sure, I could go down in weight, use a smaller box for box jumps or even step them up. How hard will I push? How hard can I push?

Before the METCON I practiced double unders. It seems like such an easy task to pass the rope twice under your feet in a single jump. I see people do it almost daily. For me, a few months ago getting twenty single consecutive jumps was a challenge. Today I had success. It shocked me. Twice.

But that all faded as I was frustrated with my singles during the METCON. And then there were burpees to contend with. Oh, and the box jump - which I almost wiped out on a few times. During workouts like this, when I'm not even doing them RX'd and am sucking wind like it's going out of style, there are always moments where I doubt I'll finish. The success a few heart beats earlier of doing something I could not do a few months ago fades into the pain and doubt of the excruciating moment before me.

Workouts with a strength bias 9 out of 10 times leave me feeling exuberant for hours. Serious natural high. METCONS wipe me out. My stomach usually feels sick and I can't even fathom putting anything in there despite the admonishment for post-workout nutrition. In contrast to the technicolor high of strength work, METCONS build within me a quiet resolve. Each time I work through the point of no return my resolve for future workouts and hardships grows. My doubt and negativity grows weaker.

I have not faced some of the hardships friends are facing. But I pray for them that their strength of character, faith, and hope become stronger through them. I pray their resolve to keep fighting the good fight grows. And I pray their hearts remain soft and full of hope.

Life has many highs and lows. We may have grief in the midst of joy, and joy in the midst of grief. No one can truly understand what someone else is going through - we are all wired differently. I'm looking to grow stronger in body, mind and faith - through the highs and the lows; the failures and the successes.